Don’t Jump
“Don’t jump.” Oh dear god. We have to call the pompiers! To get Fortuny off the ledge! It’s 3am. My friend Lori is traveling the last segment of the journey with me and she woke because the room was hot. She opens the window. We are on the 7th floor. For safety purposes the window only opens a crack. As Lori crawls back in bed she hears a noise. She shoots up! The cat! Fortuny stood on his hind legs and managed to slip through the crack in the window. I wake instantaneously. Somethings wrong. I must have heard Lori’s sharp intake of breath. As she pulls back the curtains I see Fortuny on the ledge. We had stopped in Toulon for the night between Biarritz and the Alps to see my colleague Melanie. Fortuny looks over his shoulder into the hotel room and then precariously over the ledge. Down 7 flights. I try to slide my arm through the crack and get stuck at my elbow. How the hell did the cat get through here? We panic. I pace. I curse enough to make a sailor blush. We call Fortuny’s name. Fiorella sits up and watches with interest from the bed.
She’s pregnant. After 2 years of birth control- yes -birth control for cats does exist -and 6 months of failed pregnancy attempts her belly is full of kittens. Even Frank Sinatra Jr swims on the bedside table. “Well now. This is getting interesting!” his tail flicks. Fortuny smiles at me and takes a few steps. I call reception. “Le Chat. Le Chat est sur le… How do you say ledge?? He went out the window! La fenêtre! J'ai besoin d'ouvrir la fenêtre!” I scream. The receptionist begins to understand the situation. “Your cat is outside the window!? Oh Merde!!” Si si si!! Shit. I mean Oui! My French went to hell in a hand basket soon as I started learning Italian. “Yes! My cat! Outside! I need you to open the window!.” “N’est pas possible! Ne s'ouvre pas!” You must! “I come Madame. I come to you.” She is equally panicked. A minute later there is a knock and as I open the door Lori cries “Look!” We all turn in slow motion as Fortuny slips back inside the hotel room. We all laugh and I hug Fortuny to me! “You naughty kitten! You shall have no pie”.
Photo courtesy of @okkohotels Beyond thanks to the incredible staff at OkkoToulon.
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